There is a resemblance of a story-line hidden somewhere in Battleship, but you won’t care about it. All you’ll care about is Peter Berg’s great big Fuck You to Michael Bay as he cranks the action dial up way past anything Transformers has delivered. This made for the boys action flick is apparently based on the Hasbro game of the same name – but other than a late visual reference, this Battleship has nothing in common with the board game.
Battleship the movie owes more to Tony Scott and Roland Emmerich as a sort of modern mash up of Top Gun and Independence Day, than it does to Hasbro, and it’s a better movie for it.
Of course, as with any big budget boys blockbuster action flick, you’ll have to leave your brains at the door as plot holes big enough to sail a battleship through are all too easy to spot.
But as AC/DC’s Thunderstruck goes toe to toe with the film’s massive explosions, your brain easily slips into neutral, and you relax back and enjoy the sheer awesomeness of the visual and audible assault on your senses.
We may have inadvertently invited the aliens, much as a vampire has to be invited before it can enter, but that doesn’t mean we’re going to sit back and let them clear out our home.
Whilst Battleship is one big publicity stunt for how great the American navy is, it’s surprisingly a multinational affair, with ex-mortal enemies coming together to save the day.
What’s more, whilst it certainly isn’t brain food by any stretch of the imagination, Battleship does a great job of showing that their is no such thing as a disability, be it physical, age, or ego.
Dumb action films don’t come any better than Battleship, with a nice mix of comedy and romance to give relief from the otherwise relentless action, Berg has delivered the summers most heart-pounding film, but knows enough to finish it off with pure cheese that will have you leaving the cinema with the biggest grin you’ve ever worn.
Reviewed by: Jonathan Read